Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Everyday I think to myself that when I get home for work I'm going to clean the apartment, take out the trash, organize my closet and cook a nice dinner! What really happens is I get home and remember how delightfully cozy my bed is, how delicious skittles and cheetos are and how convenient netflix is!!! Does this make me a bad person?

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Booby Trap

This may look like a 10lb kettle bell but I must inform you that it is not. This is a device installed by my wife to bludgeon my toes every time I walk to the kitchen to get a glass of water. Now, to be fair, one could argue that I should be able to avoid this bright yellow obstacle but I maintain that my excessive height prevents me from thoroughly scanning such a low service for hazardous objects. 


No this is not some hell hound terrorizing our apartment nor is it a gluttonous rodent after my private stash jalepeno cheetohs. This, my friends, is what happens when your pet cat (who is locally known by the name of Guiness) falls in the bathtub whilst being a peeping tom as your wife is taking a bath. Serves him right......creeper!

The Guardian

Do you think me strange for secretly hoping that after the cat, the wife and I are asleep, this 4 inch tall Dark Knight scurries around the apartment, checking all the doors and windows to make sure no creeps or critters try to break in? Yes I'm a grown-ass man, but as you will eventually find out about me, one of my life's ambitions is to be my wife's oldest child.

Remember when you were 8 and your idea of a good time was sitting around with a box of crayons or color pencils and drawing for hours on end? 20 years later I have rediscovered the awesomeness that is doodling, scribbling and sketching. The first of what I'm sure will be many to come is a pic I scribbled of Hellboy.....which kinda just looks like a close up shot of a red Hulk!  I think the Hulk will be my next little doodle.

Be kind, its my first sketch in ages!!!

Man Crush

This delightful chap, if you didn't know, is Christopher Waltz. I love this dude. Every character he has played  is someone I would be friends with. Well, all except for the when he played a Nazi in Inglourious Basterds for obvious reasons given my Hershey Chocolate complexion. Of all these cool people this lucky bastard gets paid to pretend to be, my favorite is his character in the movie Carnage. Do yourself a favor and watch this movie....Today.

School makes me....

Saw this online the other day. Sadly, this is quite accurate most of the time!!